So, What Happened to my favourite directors?

Well, Over the last couple of years we have had the seemingly great news that there were to be new films from the great directors Joe Dante, yes! John Carpenter, yes, yes!! John Landis, Yes Yes Yes!! And Survival of the dead a new zombie film from George Romero, Hell yeah!!!! But unfortunately they all turned out for me to be a no, no , no , no and a WTF NO!!!!!!!!!
Please note that these are my opinions so i am ready for the abuse, ha!!
Jonny T.

Joe Dante.

I was waiting with great anticipation to see Joe Dante's return with The Hole, as Gremilns and The Howling are some of my favourites of all time and to be honest the likes of Innerspace and Small Soldiers were pretty good, i was hoping for a great return to the kiddie/adult humour and horror that made his early films so great, but with The Hole i was i have to say hugely disappointed. Not that it's the worse film I've ever seen it was just the fact that every thing he had done in a film before he tried to cram in here and for me it just didn't work, the ending ( i won't spoil) was a huge let down and a big fat conveluted mess, the characters were soulless and the FX were really quite badly CGI done, so sorry Joe your my let down number 1 on the list, on to number 2, John Carpenter.

John Carpenter.

Oh Mr Carpenter i do love thee!But what has happened? This year we saw the release of The Ward, oh dear, it's not that bad but it certainly isn't that great either, what a shame, after his pretty awful Ghosts of Mars way back in 2001 this was to be his 1st full feature in 10 years, after a couple of pretty damn good episodes of Masters of horror, Cigarette burns and Pro life the signs were there for a big return of the king of cinema with The Ward, but it fell flat on it's arse, both in content and box office content, i mean, come on man you had 10 years to come up with something!! Just look at some of his films, Halloween, Escape from New York, Assault on precinct 13, Dark Star, The Thing, all hailed as classics and they indeed are, The were rumour's abound upon preview screenings of The Ward that it was poor and at the official world premier John Carpenter was not in attendance but instead sent a video message saying that he was on jury duty, he has since come out and said how he was unhappy with the studio taking control and re cutting the film to there own tastes, Hopefully at some point he will be given control and become a true master again but until that point he seems happy sitting back on his legacy and taking the cash for the countless remakes of his classics, can't say i blame him though if you have to deal with the daily dicks of big corporate companies ripping your art to shreds, come on John we want you back!!!Talking of John's, on to the next, John Landis.

John Landis. 

That's right John give me the finger!! Not known only for his horror stuff but you have to say that American werewolf in London is one of the best werewolf films ever right? His work on Jacko's thriller was just amazing, so when i heard he was doing Burke and Hare i must say i was pretty excited, then me and Emma went to see it, put it this way, it's another case of you see every funny(actually,not that funny) bit in the trailer, it just did not work, there is a ton of cameos and Simon Pegg, now then, at present Simon Pegg is doing my head in, he's popping up everywhere, Great in Shaun of the Dead etc but in this he just plays the bumbling person he has played a ton of times before, how many times can you see Simon bloody Pegg standing there with his mouth wide open!!!! So yet another disappointment for me, who knows if he'lll return to the Genre at any point, all said and done you have to love him, i don't honestly know if I've ever seen a photo of him where he's not smiling, by the way does anyone know what's happening with the American Werewolf remake?????

George A Romero.



It is with great sadness in my heart i have to say that Survival of the Dead is a pile of shit. Now every time it's announced that Granddaddy of the Dead Romero is making a new zombie film i always get excited and think hell yes whens it out but i couldn't believe how bad and what a MASSIVE let down Survival was, from the opening shockingly bad CGI head shot i though, oh no, surely it can only get better but then you see the 2 feuding Irish families with the most cliched accents and bad acting i had ever seen, it was Father Ted of the dead but not even funny, Zombie riding a horse? Zombies now eating animals, GEORGE WHAT YOU DOING??????? The master of the zombies, with contacts such as Savini, Nicotero who create the best make up in the universe, know i know he used cgi because of budget restraints etc but that does not make up for a terrible film, what was the budget on Night of the living dead?? And surely if he would have had a word with either Savini or Nicotero and seeing as Savini now runs a make up school surely he could have given his best students a project by working with Romero and Nicotero the same?

Anyway, Good old George looks set to continue with his zombie crusade, lets just hope that he's learned and moves on, come on George you can do it, give Savini a ring!!!!

Rant Over,

Jonny T.